My Parents divorced when I was two. I do remember my Mom packing up the house to move. I remember because my Mom got us McDonald's for dinner. Brooks' chicken nuggets weren't all the way cooked. It's crazy what we remember and what we never knew happened. My Father remarried to my Stepmother and they have been married ever since. My Dad worked at the Sheriff's Office and took on a couple extra jobs. We didn't get to see him much due to him working on the weekends. When he came home before it was bedtime, he would cuddle with us and we would lay with him on the couch and watch t.v. He made time to show us by his actions that he cared and loved us.
My Mom re-married when I was six. We moved away. Every summer I went to Pensacola to see my Dad. I'll never forget the exit where my parents met halfway to drop us off/pick us up. Fort Deposit, Alabama. I HATE that BP gas station still to this day. Leaving the gas station was heartbreaking. I was leaving my Mom when I was going to my Dad's and I was leaving my Dad when I was going back with my Mom. It was absolutely devastating. My ex stepfather took part in my life and I soon called him "Dad". He coached my swim team, basketball team, and softball teams. He helped me with homework and kept us in church. I give thanks to him for keeping our family in church because later in life, I would become a born again Christian.
Sadly, my Mother & Bill divorced after 4 years and we relocated back to Pensacola. I had to start life over again in the 5th grade. I felt like something was missing from my life. I was young, immature, and didn't understand things as well as I do now. I had yearned for a stronger relationship with my Dad. I didn't know what to do or how to obtain it.
My Dad signed up to go overseas. His duty was to train the Afghan Police. Little did I know, this would be a life changing event. Because of EMAIL, I now have the relationship I have always yearned to have with my Father. He has always put a smile on my face and I always knew he cared. But now, my Father is my Hero. He truly is. I love my Mama to death. She has been there through thick and thin and has played the father figure many times. But now, I have a Mom and a DAD.
It's crazy that at the age of 25, I now have the relationship I wanted my whole life. It's ironic that it took my Dad going to a place of war to build a relationship that now means the world to me. We emailed almost everyday. The Lord works in mysterious ways. and although the strong bond has recently occurred, I wouldn't change a thing.
Saturday, June 9, 2012
Thursday, May 3, 2012
Sweet Ada
By the grace of God, there are a few things that keep my head held high and not giving up on life about my Grandmother's death. Yes, I still cry. Yes, I still ask why but, I continue to remember these things when I feel like I can't go on without her...
First, I believe with ALL of my heart, (because I am a firm believer in Christ), that this Earth is not our home. Heaven is our home. I will never question or doubt this. God tells us this in His Word. We are meant to walk with Jesus for eternity in His beyond-imaginable Golden Palace. I know my Meme is enjoying every bit of it. She gets to dress up in gowns that she used to always wear. She gets to put on the prettiest of jewelry known to man. She gets to sing and dance with her own Mother and her Aunt Sarah and many more friends and family. She is FREE. Not a tear falls from her eye. This gives me peace.
Secondly, I know that God took my Meme to Heaven because her purpose here on this earth was fulfilled. She had done her job that God planned for her to do. She touched so many peoples' lives and God blessed me, her family, and friends with her laugh, her beauty, her understanding, her love, and her strength that I admired so much. This gives me peace.
Thirdly, I will see her beautiful face again. I can only hope that she is looking down on me proud of me and leaning over to Jesus saying, "You know, I taught her that." It brings a smile to my face to know she is walking alongside the I AM. She is one lucky lady. This brings me joy.
Always remember, (as do I daily), that we are God's children. We belong to Him, and to His Home we will go when we pass away. I know I am a sinner, but I also know that I want to make my Father proud. I want him to look down and smile at what I've done, and what I am doing here on Earth. I make mistakes but at the same time, I want to glorify Him in every way possible. This is my duty on Earth. I'm not trying to preach to anyone reading this blog. I am simply typing, and in some way, I am preaching to myself. We are so loved by Christ and we are beautiful in His image. I don't want to let Him down. He is all that matters to me. Don't give up on life, for our Creator has big plans for us.
xoxo.
First, I believe with ALL of my heart, (because I am a firm believer in Christ), that this Earth is not our home. Heaven is our home. I will never question or doubt this. God tells us this in His Word. We are meant to walk with Jesus for eternity in His beyond-imaginable Golden Palace. I know my Meme is enjoying every bit of it. She gets to dress up in gowns that she used to always wear. She gets to put on the prettiest of jewelry known to man. She gets to sing and dance with her own Mother and her Aunt Sarah and many more friends and family. She is FREE. Not a tear falls from her eye. This gives me peace.
Secondly, I know that God took my Meme to Heaven because her purpose here on this earth was fulfilled. She had done her job that God planned for her to do. She touched so many peoples' lives and God blessed me, her family, and friends with her laugh, her beauty, her understanding, her love, and her strength that I admired so much. This gives me peace.
Thirdly, I will see her beautiful face again. I can only hope that she is looking down on me proud of me and leaning over to Jesus saying, "You know, I taught her that." It brings a smile to my face to know she is walking alongside the I AM. She is one lucky lady. This brings me joy.
Always remember, (as do I daily), that we are God's children. We belong to Him, and to His Home we will go when we pass away. I know I am a sinner, but I also know that I want to make my Father proud. I want him to look down and smile at what I've done, and what I am doing here on Earth. I make mistakes but at the same time, I want to glorify Him in every way possible. This is my duty on Earth. I'm not trying to preach to anyone reading this blog. I am simply typing, and in some way, I am preaching to myself. We are so loved by Christ and we are beautiful in His image. I don't want to let Him down. He is all that matters to me. Don't give up on life, for our Creator has big plans for us.
xoxo.
Friday, April 13, 2012
on my heart...
just some things i would like to say to some select people. maybe you're one of them?
1. i don't care if the baby wipes are "far away"... wipe your child when you're changing their diaper.
2. your wife looks like your granddaughter. oh yeah, f you.
3. she's been a bitch since you met her. it's about time.
4. don't say mean things when you are mad. you will end up losing friends.
5. i'm your only friend to go to? try reaching out to your bowling pals.
6. you talk so much gossip about other people but, heaven forbid they mention your name!
7. just tell the truth. i'm not going to slit my wrists over crap you have to say.
8. be a man. don't break hearts.
9. karma just kicked you in your ass.
10. you're on food stamps but you have a Coach purse and an Iphone? really....
11. got something to say, say it to my face. i won't punch you, i'll talk to you like a woman.
12. gosh, i wish you knew how good i would treat you if you were mine.
13. yeah, you DO need to give your child more positive re-enforcements.
14. look at what's in front of you...
15. how in God's name are you Atheist???? how do you live each day???
16. bless your little heart, sweetie.
17. you look like a fool.
18. you're stronger than you think. you got this.
xoxo. :)
1. i don't care if the baby wipes are "far away"... wipe your child when you're changing their diaper.
2. your wife looks like your granddaughter. oh yeah, f you.
3. she's been a bitch since you met her. it's about time.
4. don't say mean things when you are mad. you will end up losing friends.
5. i'm your only friend to go to? try reaching out to your bowling pals.
6. you talk so much gossip about other people but, heaven forbid they mention your name!
7. just tell the truth. i'm not going to slit my wrists over crap you have to say.
8. be a man. don't break hearts.
9. karma just kicked you in your ass.
10. you're on food stamps but you have a Coach purse and an Iphone? really....
11. got something to say, say it to my face. i won't punch you, i'll talk to you like a woman.
12. gosh, i wish you knew how good i would treat you if you were mine.
13. yeah, you DO need to give your child more positive re-enforcements.
14. look at what's in front of you...
15. how in God's name are you Atheist???? how do you live each day???
16. bless your little heart, sweetie.
17. you look like a fool.
18. you're stronger than you think. you got this.
xoxo. :)
Friday, April 6, 2012
thinking....
I've heard different opinions on visiting gravesites and keeping flowers in their vases, etc. Because I am a firm believer in Christ and His Word, I do believe my loved ones are in Heaven. Yes, their bodies are buried but their souls are in Heaven. So, why do I keep my loved ones' graves pretty? I can't answer that because, it honestly doesn't make sense. That person isn't there. Several months before my "Meme" passed away, we were putting flowers on Her Mother's grave. She made me promise that I would keep her gravestone pretty when she passed. Of course I promised her I would. My Sister can barely go to the Cemetery. But for me, it's comforting. It's something I honestly cannot explain. I was once told by someone that they didn't understand why I was so into taking pictures of new flowers put in the vases and etc. I couldn't give her a good reason. She said it shouldn't matter because that person is in Heaven. Part of me wants to make sense of why I do what I do. Opinions?
xoxo.
xoxo.
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Dusty Sanderson
DUSTY SANDERSON
My Cousin, Dusty, is the lead singer of the local band, "Southern Drifters". He writes most of his songs, although he does some covers of famous Artists. He has dreams of making it far in the music industry. Singing and playing guitar are his life. When I go out to hear him sing, his songs make me THINK, and they inspire me. Here soon, he plans to pack up and head to Nashville, TN to make a name for himself. I am very proud of Dusty and the hard work he puts in to entertain fans, family, and friends. God blessed Dusty with a great singing voice and a talent for songwriting. I pray and hope his dreams will be full-filled. If you wanna hear him and the band, Southern Drifters, come to Chan's Nightclub this Saturday Night 3/31/12 at 9pm. It's a damn good time and I promise, you won't be disappointed.
xxox.
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